I need to vent, and since nobody actually reads this, I figured this is as good a journal as any. I've now been married just more than a year. It has certainly been a difficult year as any new marriage is. We brought a child into the world 4 months after the wedding so either I have the gestation period of a beagle or I was knocked up at the ceremony. You draw your own conclusions.

The truth is, we have been together now for several years. We're both in our thirties and honestly, if you think I'm a trick for doing things out of order, please allow me to judge your lifestyle choices and we will see who is the morally corrupt person.

Recently, I tried out for Top Chef. I've heard nothing so I think it's safe to say, I didn't make it. I'm not too bummed out. I didn't feel as qualified as my opponents, and I definitely didn't have the passion to make it as some others. I've never actually seen an episode of Top Chef. People seem shocked when I say this. I've also never seen an episode of Hell's Kitchen, and I only watch the food network when my best friend, Vanessa, turns it on. Although I don't presently work in a full service kitchen (I'm baking cupcakes at a chain), the LAST thing I want to do when I come home is turn on the T.V. and watch the same thing I've been doing all day.

I've watched a couple minutes here and there of the formerly mentioned cooking shows, and it's raised my blood pressure so much that I've had to turn it off. That being said, it's probably a good thing for my heart and my head to not have made it onto Top Chef. Not to say that I don't love cooking. I do. I love food. I love going to restaurants, and I love preparing a meal with no previous thought as to what I will make. I love just going into my fridge and cabinets and seeing what is about to go bad and making it into some delicious concoction that I will savor to its last crumb (usually following a wee bit of herb to really get the appetite juices flowing).

My kitchen is small and outdated, but it's mine. I can't start anything until it's clean, and usually that takes me a good hour because I have 3 people (me, my husband and my baby) to clean up after. Aside from the couple little annoyances that he does, like instead of taking 30 seconds to wash a dirty pan, he'll take 2 minutes to bend over, open the cabinet, pick up the Russian Doll collection of pans to dirty a new one, now creating 2 dirty pans or putting dishes in the dishwasher without rinsing them, I actually don't have a problem cleaning up after him.

I actually like the idea of an old fashioned household where he brings home the bacon and I cook it. I like the role of housewife/homemaker. HOWEVER, I am now noticing that several of my silverware is missing. Why is it that a man who will use a paper plate at home in order to avoid doing dishes will bring my classic, no-longer-made, silverware to work with him, and then proceed to lose it? That drives me BANANAS!!!!!! I'm now missing half my forks and a third of my spoons. Some of my plates are missing, too, but he probably broke those. I'm less upset about that. I want my silverware back.

Are the Writers of "The Good Wife" British?

I've truly enjoyed watching "The Good Wife". Not only are the cases cleverly twisted, but usually the protagonist firm wins. I like happy endings (get your mind out of the gutter... I mean on movies and T.V. shows). We don't particularly root for any specific character because there is no one good guy or bad guy, but the sleaziest of characters are pretty much the most likable.

Here's my problem. It takes place in Chicago. I'm from Chicago, well the suburbs, but my entire extended family, on both sides, is from the South Side of Chicago, and indeed they sound like it. Some are educated, some are very educated, but no amount of education can take those short sounding vowels and rough pronunciation out of their vernacular. I also know a number of Chicago lawyers, one of whom I contacted just to double check that it wasn't some jargon among the Chicago law community. So why oh why do the writers of the show say "phone" whenever anyone on the show should say "call". For example: "I'll phone you later." "She phoned me when she found out." I've never met one Chicagoan, native or implant, EVER to use the word "phone" as a synonym for "call". It's distracting and situationally wrong, and it drives me crazy every time I watch this otherwise really good show.

Years Ahead for "Mad Men"

"Mad Men" is one of those rare T.V. shows that just gets better the longer it's on. I don't think I'm being too quick to judge when I say they've just ended their best season ever, a season that may have held T.V's best hour ever (the episode mentioned in my previous blog). It's also one of those shows that saddens me when there are only 10 minutes left. I need more!

Last night's season 4 finale was, I don't want to say predictable, because I wasn't exactly sure how the writers were going to make it all go down, but it was satisfying while at the same time, left SO many possibilities open for conflict in the near future. We obviously knew Don would be engaged this season because his good doctor girlfriend, Faye Miller, so aptly foreshadowed that he'd be married by the end of the year. We guessed or at least hoped that it'd probably be Megan because of the way she handled Sally's little outburst and the way Don reacted to it. Speaking of Megan, I have loved her character. I love that she is Betty's opposite, not that the screen doesn't beg for more of January Jones, but let's face it, the writer's don't exactly make her likable.

I love that the writers mentioned Megan's messed up teeth just to show that she's aware of her imperfections and embraces them. I love that she didn't get all sappy the first time she and Don slept together. I mean, the writers knew just how to pull us in and make us want her want to be our stepmom. They also made Faye just the right amount of something wrong so we weren't too upset when Don dumped her, but still felt for the poor woman.

Now, what's to come in the next season? Well, I'm sure we can expect marital problems. Don isn't monogamous to anyone. I hope they won't end the marriage so quickly, though. We can expect problems with Sally and Megan. Even the most patient of people will struggle with an adolescent girl. And, I'm not sure if it'll be as soon as this season, but sometime down the road, Peggy and Faye will start their own firm, possibly even including Peggy's friend in the building. I've actually figured that this will happen since the very first episode of "Mad Men". I actually think as chauvinistic as the show is, it's truly about women emerging from their "place" in society, with Peggy at the forefront. I hope to have years ahead of us with "Mad Men" so there's no need to rush any individual story in my opinion.

I'll Take My Steak Bloody

My present sous chef suggested to me a while back that when ordering red meat, always ask for it cooked cooler than what I want it. For instance, if I want a medium burger, order it medium rare because kitchen staff typically tends to overcook it (at least in this town they do) and then it'll arrive perfectly pink.

Yesterday, the ladies in my family all joined to eat at the Nordstrom Cafe in Oak Brook, IL. If you ever find yourself there, my suggestion is to order the roast beef sandwich with the tomato basil soup. It's a safe and easy choice; you can't go wrong. However, this has become a regular meeting place for my family and me when I've visited home recently. While I typically don't deviate once I've found the right order at a restaurant, I also don't frequent most restaurants as often I have the Nordstrom Cafe. So I've been on the menu-search for another acceptable meal.

As I have mentioned before in previous blogs, sometimes I wish chefs would just make the couple things they make well, and no more. They can choose what to feed us because they are proud of those dishes and know they work. I rarely brag about my ability to cook because I honestly don't think I'm the greatest. I'm fairly new to it, and I still have lots to learn. I do, though, make a few things that I know are awesome, and I would throw down with Bobby Flay any time on this handful of items.

I'm not sure how the Nordstrom Cafe works, whether there is one head chef out in California who decides a standard menu for every Nordstrom in the country or if each cafe has its own chef who decides the menu. This last time I was there, I decided to try the skirt steak. It was prepared typically as you would expect to see a skirt steak, with a lime herb marinade, paired with some roasted potatoes, carrots and asparagus (asparagus is not in season, but even shipped in, it was still tasty). Actually, the veggies were cooked perfectly a dente, and while roasted potatoes are not my first choice of spud preparation, they were very good. The steak was the problem.

I don't know if you've ever had the pleasure of eating at a Nordstrom cafe, but this is how it works. At the Oak Brook one, you go to one of several cashiers and order your food and beverage. The server comes to your table a few minutes later to pick up your ticket, then he or she delivers the food and drink, and you tip them. I do hope they share that tip with the cashiers, but doubtful. At the downtown one, you actually get your own beverage and you are still expected to tip the servers. Now I am the last person who'll complain about tipping. I've worked as a server for a collective 8 or 9 years before, during and after moving to the back of the house, but I actually did some work when waiting on tables.

The cashier is the one who took my steak order and didn't ask me what temp I wanted my skirt. She just informed me that the chefs cooked it between rare and medium rare. I said, "Perfect." Usually, when you are informed of how the chef will prepare your steak, there is no need to specify that you want it red. In fact, sometimes you should err on the side of caution and expect it a bit bloodier (that's not really blood on your plate) than what you're told. I never mind if it's too pink or red because if I honestly can't take it, I'll send it back and have then throw it on the grill for a minute.

About 15 to 20 minutes later, our food arrived. This was strange because everyone else ordered sandwiches, and I ordered a rare steak. The food should've taken 10 minutes at the most, and I'm including cook time for orders before ours. The steak needed about 3 to 4 minutes on the grill and 5 minutes of resting time which could've been included in the time it took the server to deliver the food. I was already worried. I cut into my steak, and I kid you not, it was brown.

The reason I don't have a problem sending back an undercooked steak is because I know I'm not wasting product. They'll give me the same steak I sent back. When a steak is overcooked, I deal with it because I don't want them to use an entirely new piece of meat, and risk that they'll overcook it again anyway. The steak also was still tender and had good flavor, but I was SO annoyed that they could have made that huge mistake. Did the cook just forget about it? Did the server just leave it under the hot lamp? I mean, how disappointing when you're so looking forward to cutting into the meat, having the jus just run all over your plate over the veggies and bread. There's nothing better. Then instead, you cut into a brown, overcooked, dry steak. I'm still not over it.

Looking back, if it happened all over again, I would send it back. I'd risk pissing off the kitchen staff (they'd end up eating it anyway so they wouldn't be too pissed) to get the steak I wanted, and no person in the world could've argued that that steak was rare. Chalk it up to the grill cook's error.

The Beauty of "Mad Men"

I absolutely LOVED last Sunday's "Mad Men"! The tension, anger, respect, loyalty, trust, protectiveness, and friendship between Peggy and Don gives me goosebumps and chills, and it makes my mind bounce like a pinball. It was the episode of the fight number 2 between Cassius Clay and Sonny Liston. The fight was the historical event used to help the audience that was alive during that time put things into perspective and help people like me learn a little bit about sports history. As for the story line, the writers broached the long questioned topic of the relationship between Peggy and Don. What is it between the two of them? I can't decide if I do or I don't want Peggy and Don to have a romantic relationship. That's what makes the story line so fantastic. I want them to end up together, but simultaneously, I know it'll ruin everything if they do. They couldn't possibly. When it comes down to it, Peggy might just be the young female Don.

While so many episodes are tedious and frustrating, we need them to get to episodes like this one and the finale of last season, season 3. Every character in "Mad Men" is neither completely likable nor dislikable. That's what makes the show so alluring, so addicting. In the first episode of the first season, I was furious at how women were treated. Then my mom oh-so-reminded-me, it was just the way. Obviously, not everyone agreed with my mom's mentality or women wouldn't have come so far, but no use in getting upset about the past now that it has changed. I have just learned to appreciate the artistry of Mad Men". Even during the boring slow episodes, I still enjoy learning about how it was versus how they wanted us to see it, meaning just because TV showed couples sleeping in 2 twin size beds 4 feet apart didn't mean people stopped having sex.

This week's episode returned to the usual less eventful anger-provoking, slow-moving solution-lacking stories. We feel so sorry for Joan, and then in true fashion, "Mad Men" makes her hateful and human. Even within that chaos of dissatisfaction, the viewer knows it's bound to end somewhere awesome. Why? Because the show has endless possibilities. While teen dramas decline when they go to college, while adult dramas decline when the main problem is solved, "Mad Men" has no expiration date and no overlying conflict. It is real, it happened 40-some years ago so the writers have a show that could potentially be on forever, as long as advertising still exists, "Mad Men" has material.

I suppose the Rachel Zoe Project is the only show on TV worth my comments as of now. It doesn't mean I think it's particularly well-done or that I necessarily like Rachel Zoe. It just happens to be an off season. Actually, like Project Runway, most shows on HGTV besides Sarah's House, which is the greatest show ever... right now(yes I see the irony), and America's Next Top Model, I fast-forward the majority of the dramatic junk and play only the artsy material. In this case, the fashion shows. I actually think that I fast-forwarded through an entire hour of Project Runway last night just to see the actual runway pieces.

In the case of Rachel Zoe, however, I watch the scenes between her and her husband because I kind of like Roger. As I mentioned in my previous blog, the theme this season has been whether Rachel will get pregnant or not. I thought she was in her late 40s, but apparently she's only 39, a bit risky for a pregnancy, but not unheard of. Roger really wants a baby and continues to press Rachel about it. She clearly is uninterested in spreading her love, or is just incapable of the emotion, regardless, a child seems like something that she'd just be doing to please her husband. I actually don't think that's an awful reason to have a child. No matter what, she'll love the child unconditionally when the little tyke joins the world so to me, the reason you get pregnant is unimportant. It's what you do during the child's life that counts.

I assume that the show will predictably announce that she is indeed expecting in the season finale, but I'm really really really hoping for twist. I want Roger to announce that he's leaving Rachel for a girl in her early twenties and that the new girl is actually expecting his child, and they plan on having several more as the girl is the fresh and ready child-bearing age. I think that would be the best finale EVER!

The Rachel Zoe Hypocrisy

As with most experts in their trades, I really don't care what their personality or psychosis is. I care about their talent. Whatever Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey do when they're not singing is none of my concern. All I know is, when they belt out those vocals, very few can beat them. The same goes for Michael Jordon and Tiger Woods in their respective sports, and I'm embarrassed to say this, but Tom Cruise, as nuts as he may be, is a good actor so as far as Rachel Zoe and her personality go, it really doesn't matter to me other than the irony that's going on in her new season.

While Brad is much funnier, light-hearted and relaxed without Taylor around, he's a bit bitchy whenever she's mentioned. The whole reason she was fired (besides the alleged theft) was that she had a bad attitude. So why are Rachel and Brad bad-mouthing her every chance they get? Aren't they doing the one thing they criticized Taylor for? And as far as her stealing items, to me, that seems like par for the course. That would be the one perk of the job of a styling assistant to keep some of the merchandise. Why else put up with all the chaos that Rachel throws her way? Brad keeps saying that he hopes Taylor's replacement is lacking the drama, but with every insult he speaks, he becomes more and more like Taylor. Truth be told, is Brad as talented as Taylor? I don't know yet, but even with all of Taylor's complaints and chips on her shoulder, she had amazing sense of style, and I believe that many people in Hollywood won't care one bit about her past with Rachel Zoe, as long as they look good. I certainly wouldn't.

Moving on, I've always said that my dream job would be that of Sarah Richardson of Sarah's House on HGTV. She completely guts and reconstructs fixer-upper homes with a budget of more than a million dollars. I think my number 2 job would be that of a stylist. All they do is shop and borrow items all day long. Hardly any exchange of currency is involved; it's just free advertising for the designer. It's absolutely amazing. The only reason it wouldn't be number one is because you'd have to deal with celebrities.

And finally, did Rachel say, "When I'm pregnant..." ???? How old is she? I thought she was like 50. Jeez. She needs some steak and a nap.